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This is my third attempt at a blog, not counting my two abandoned tumblr accounts. 

I shared my first Blogger blog with my friend, back in 2016. Moved on solo to WordPress in 2008. Kept at it for a few years before discovering tumblr. A couple of more years later, I abandoned my WordPress blog. The last post there was published April 2012. (I just checked).

I abandoned writing circa 2015. I had decided to let it go, to just stop. To keep whatever words I thought I had left to myself. I had started to believe that they are of no real value, and that maybe it's better I just shut it. Now I don't know if my words have any value at all, maybe not, but I cannot keep them all sealed shut inside my brain anymore. They're growing like mold and leaking out of old worn out spots in my brain. What oozes out isn't verbal, the words are still trapped and all what comes out instead is salt and tantrums and frustration. 

I figured maybe I need to open that jar a tad bit and give them a chance to breathe. Maybe I shouldn't worry too much about who I offend (myself included) and how repetitive and common and mediocre my thoughts would feel. Maybe it's alright to pour it all out - or at least try, even if none of it holds real value or none of it is unique and unspoken. Maybe chill, Hagar? 

So, here we go again.

هنشوف هنكمل ولا هنفكس.